Thursday, February 22, 2007

Another Fine Dining Experience

Around three or four years after the idiotic car driving era (as seen in the previous post), and prior to any of us actually growing up, Loz and myself went out for a few beers with our friends Chris and his girlfriend who lived in Tamworth. At around pub closing time it was decided we should all go for a curry.

This in itself was fine.

Unfortunately for us, the whole event was slightly marred because of some bloke sitting behind Loz and myself wearing a ridiculous tank top with horizontal stripes made up of pastel colours.

Chris and his sober girlfriend were facing Loz and myself and had a good clear view of Tank Top Man who was quietly sat at the table with his mates.

Upon catching site of the tank top, Chris couldn't contain himself. He was in fits of laughter and desperately needed to share his amusement with Loz and myself. Loz was too busy tucking into his chicken madras to worry about some bloke with a tank top, so I decided to turn round and have a quick peep myself. That's all it took, just that one glance. The pair of us had tears streaming down our faces. But it was a bit like a drug addiction, one glance simply wasn't enough. I needed another fix!!!

"Go on Mike, take another look."

"I can't. The bloke's bound to notice"

With that, Chris hurls a fork over my shoulder, a great excuse for me to get up/turn round, pick it up and steel another glance.

And so it went on for twenty minutes or more, fork flying aplenty, both Chris and myself in fits of laughter, Loz taking no notice what so ever, being too engrossed in the important task of curry eating, and Chris's girlfriend getting more and more embarrassed and outraged.

Eventually Chris's girlfriend, realising that we were taking no notice of her calls for silence, turned to Loz for support.

"Loz, please get them to pack it in, you're the only sensible one here."

Dutifully, Loz gives in to her pleas for help. Slamming his knife and fork down, turning round and pointing in the direction of Tank Top Man, he takes a deep breath, and at the top of his voice, bellows....

"Look, I don't see what's so funny about THAT MAN'S TANK TOP!!!" (Point, point, point point)

As you can imagine, the by now ex girlfriend stands up and storms out the restaurant.

*The End*


Oh dear, we're not painting a very good picture of ourselves are we?

7 comments:

Elaine Denning said...

Was it the tank top or the stripes which did it?

They're very 'in' now, ya know. It's weird...who'd have thunk a student in a tank top would become the face of Top Man?

I think you should buy one :)

Unknown said...

What a tale. Brilliant. I can't believe I'd never heard that one! How about the story of mike and loz and the park ranger over Chasewater just to balance out loz's sensible image created here!

Anonymous said...

Tank top.. Pastel? Ugh. What year was this?

Mike said...

Nick, I will definitely be adding that story. You'll be pleased to know I've actually got some pictures of the event!!!

Blither, it was late 80's.

Miss U, I have a better idea. I think you should buy one instead. I'm too busy tucking my shirt into my jeans!! :)

Anonymous said...

Mmmmm....I lived in Tamworth about then, I did have a girlfiend.... I wish to make it clear that I was in no way connected to the above event! I do however recall that Mike only ever drove his Shuvit at 29mph in those days and only ever visited anyone if he needed to use the toilet! This was before he took up caravanning and carried his own toilet around in a big box behind the car! Anon for now

Mike said...

Oh no, I haven't got to start guessing now have I? Right then, my first educated guess is going to have to be Chris Culverwell.

Mike said...

I think you're missing the point!